DAY 134: The Desteni of Living - My Declaration of Principle

On this blog I share the Principles that I commit myself to Stand as and Live by, manifested in everything I Do, Speak and Think. This is my Process of Living, supported by the Desteni tools, that I Walk for myself.

1. Realising and living my utmost potential

2. Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3. Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4. Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5. Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6. Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7. Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

8. With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

9. Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10. Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to LIVE

11. No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12. Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13. Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14. Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15. Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

16. Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17. I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18. I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

19. Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20. Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21. We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

22. The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23. The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

Start your Process with the assistance of a Group of People dedicated to Life.

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

Supporting materials: https://eqafe.com/free

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DAY 128: Where change begins

This morning I woke up with this old sensation within me of wanting to avoid the day ahead and the things that I have to do. In self-honesty I see that this pattern has been around mainly related to my relationship to the Masters that I am taking, however I have been trying to hide it with other things that I have judged to be "easier" tasks in order to almost forget my study responsibilities.

So when I finally got out of bed, I gave me a moment to stop the thoughts and to start saying Self-Forgiveness out loud about the self-defeat thoughts that I woke up with, such as "I am not good enough to have a Masters, I don't deserve to have it if I don't study for it, I am not as dedicated to it as other people are", and I got to the point of seeing that I haven't simply walked the decision of actually changing my relationship to my studies, to my career, to my priorities. Instead of learning from others, I have been using comparisons to interiorise myself and to justify my self-judgments of not being able to become the best I can be in my studies/academic performance. This relationship pattern already existed within me and it is now being projected towards my studies, so I can embrace this opportunity to get to know me on this point and start seeing how I can change my relationship with myself and, consequently, with my studies and everything I do in every moment of my existence.

After this I decided to start my day with a plan of action, starting with a nice breakfast and a list of things that realistically I should be able to do with the time I have today. A very important thing that contributed to this self-stabilization within me this morning was to decide to watch the most recent DesteniiProcess hangout, where I heard the words that I was not giving to myself. That is why I called today's blog Where change begins, because this was a point that the panellists focused on: starting by Self is the only way to make the change happen. No comparison should be involved, no self-judgment, no self-defeat, no powerlessness - if that happens in my mind, I am aware that I am the one allowing such mind-set to possess me and to control me. In self-responsibility, I can stop the thoughts, forgive myself, and assist myself to change in the moment, give myself direction and, in my case, restart my day with a plan that corresponds to my study responsibilities and to my decision to expand my expertise and my potential through doing a MA.

On my next post I will share my Self-Forgiveness and my Self-Corrective process in regards to this depressive relationship towards my studies and my redefinition of my priorities.

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DAY 127: Supporting Each Other on How To Stop Stressing Out in Life

I invite you all to watch and listen to the recent DesteniiProcess Hangout that continues the topic discussed on my previous post related to Headache, despair and stress.

While participating in the hangout I realised the importance of having the support of the Destonians group and people that do care about Life on Earth, in humans, animals and all the beings, to share the problem and, even more important, to share the solutions! This is the potential that exists within Humanity while we are currently busy with competition and blinded by separation, when in fact the key is looking insider Self, take a decision to sort out one's mess and to live the decision to expand oneself outside of one's fears and judgments.

Through this process I come to realise that the outcome of taking care of self is the cooperation with others, because in self-stability one is stable to give and share. By giving and sharing, one is receiving from the interaction with another, from their solutions, perspectives and there is mutual support. This is also what the Thursday DesteniiProcess live hangouts are about.


Helpful links: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFWwl1Wllt8&feature=youtube_gdata
Desteni Forum: http://forum.desteni.org/
Eqafe Free Downloads: https://eqafe.com/free

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DAY 116: Self-Correction on the fear of a car accident with friends

I am now sharing my Self-corrective statements in relation to the projection of accidents based on the memory of a loss of a friend in a car accident during my childhood. The previous two posts DAY 34: Haunted by Memories and DAY 35: Self-forgiveness on the memory of a friend's death give the context of the memory, the thoughts and the Self-forgiveness on facing the fear.

Continuation...

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to hesitate stopping the fears just because the fear energy became a comfort zone in me, like a refugee of my mind that keeps me in the loop of the known memories and known fears.

Self-corrective statements:

I realise that looking for refugee in the comfort of fears is a time loop that keeps me in the trap of accumulating and believing in my own fears, which are limiting myself in my expression and self-expansion. I commit myself to embrace the responsibility of taking care of myself Here and Now, supporting myself to stop the mind and changing/correcting me for a stable version of myself.

When and as I see myself going into the memories of car accidents when I am in a car with friends, I stop and I breathe.

When and as I see myself creating instability within me related to the emotion of fear whenever I access a memory/idea/projection of a car accident, I stop and I breathe. I realise that fear does not protect me  nor avoids accidents from happening.

When and as I see myself using memories to justify the fear energy, I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to look at the emotions attached to the memory and to forgive them.

I realise that the memory can be supportive to show me my mind and the points that I am holding on to, instead of transcending it and move on.

When and as I see myself thinking of me as a victim in the car just like my friend was a victim in the accident, I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to stop comparing me to other people's lives and to stop using other people's experiences to determine my choices. I realise that by projecting other people's experiences in my own life is a way of disrespecting myself here and now, it is self-dishonest and it is pointless.  

I realise that my mind is not to be trusted but my self-forgiveness is to be trusted and lived.

When and as I see myself taking the fear-energy related to this memory as personal, I stop and I breathe. I realise I don't have to participate in the fear nor in the thoughts of the mind  because the starting point is still of fear that something bad happens to me which is already a self-sabotage. I realise that seeing how my mind works and how the energy works supports me to direct myself in investigating the point to understand where the fear comes from.

When and as I see myself using a memory of fear to limit my expression when doing something new (e.g. going in a car with friends) I stop the fear and I breathe until I am stable. I realise that in order to assess the point I must not be influenced by memories. What I can do is to check if everything is ok in the car, practically, even communicating any concern with the driver but doing it so from a common sense starting point without projections nor imagination.

I realise that living in fear is not living and that I can only fully live without fear.

When and as I see myself imagining accidents on the road in front of me and imagining that I could have prevented by speaking it up, I stop and I breathe. I realise that the desire to be seen as a hero in an accident is the positive polarity of the self-victimisation in the mind and that none of it is real. I commit myself to direct myself in moments when memories seem to drive and to take the responsibility to lead my correction application through stopping the thoughts/images of the mind and to be present in my actions to guarantee that I am aware of myself and stABLE to live me here.

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DAY 108: How do I make decisions?

I can decide to drift in the mind or to give me direction. Recently I have been noticing the thoughts that take me to the emptiness of uncertainty and it creates a feeling of powerlessness. This feeling of the mind, althought made of powerlessness, can have the power to contaminate my reality. I wonder if this is a life pattern that everyone faces. Is everyone living in between the mind and, very now and then, in this reality? Or never at all. My mind goes easily into a poetry moment when it comes to face the hard walls of my mind.

So at the moment I am living the decision to not drift into the mind of thoughts and I have decided to focus on a task that I proposed myself to do but that I forgot to actually start it. How many times it happens to start something with the best intentions to finish it (I can actually see the final product in my mind as if it is real) but the actual physical realisation never takes off completely from the initial motivation? Now that I am looking at this point, a new interesting dimension came up: when I imagine something being done, I associate it with how the time is portrayed in movies and in TV series - things happen in quantum decisions because I see the character thinking about something and the next scene the person is already doing it. Have I not tried to implement this quantum decision-making in my own life too?

How many times do I take a decision of slowing down and take the time to perfect myself but suddenly I change my decision based on the imagination of the next challenge - but when the challenge comes, I start thinking twice because I have not taken the time to establish my foundation. I must not take the quantum-action of series personally as I am walking this life in real-time. If decisions as based on imagination, then it is not trustworthy. I better test it in real-time and find out for myself if such decision works for me.

If I am constantly desiring to have a quantum-mind experience copying what happens in movies and series, the notion of time is going to be manipulated and this physical reality disregarded.

So the task that I am going to walk this week is to look at how I make decisions. It is a great timing as I am walking this point on my DIP lesson and I have been having an enormous resistance to walk the exercise of identifying the positive and the negative elements that make my decision-making. It is just unacceptable to waste this opportunity to support myself and change who and how I have been existing as.

Do I make decisions based on the movies and series' fiction-time? Or do I actually consider real time?

Do I make decisions based on the fear of loss?

Do I make decisions based on negative and positive feelings/emotions?

Is my decision based on common-sense?

Am I wanting to copy someone else? Am I wanting to be somebody else?

When I go into the mind, the past and the future dance with each other. It requires training to be in physical time, think in physical time and accept physical time. I must finally realise that my body requires a breath-in and a breath-out to function well and that my life-time is made of the breaths I take and give.

The decision to stop and write here and right now was not planned in my mind - I had to impose it to myself otherwise I would stay in the pre-programmed mode of imagining it and getting distracted with thoughts outside of me.

Thinking about other people's lives is also a point to consider that is manifested in the movies and TV series. A decision that I must take is to really investigate where my thoughts come from when I am looking at another's person life. I must decide to bring those points to myself - investigate where the comparison come from, what do I perceive the other has, how do I judge me in relation to the other, etc.  This will allow me to identify my mind-decisions and obviously support me in my correction from the mind to real-physical time. I will walk the decision point this week and I will be sharing some of my realisations that will eventually arise.

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DAY 106: I end up never doing what I have planned to do

There has been this constant backchat of self-defeat: "I can never do what I have planned to do", based on the assumption that time is too short for my things - is time too short or am I exhausting it with many plans and little action? If I spend time in the mind in thinking what I will do, I am already creating the experience of not corresponding to the mind, because real things take real time. It is supportive to take notes of tasks to do but more than that is daydreaming - I am more productive if I start the actions, rather than thinking about it.

The things that I have not been doing include my self-writing and studying.

Writing every day is time that I give back to myself and it is fair that, if during the day I am giving my time/attention to others, I should equally dedicate time for myself. I am aware of this unbalance whereby I tend to give to others that which I am not giving to myself. - How can I be stable with another if I am not being stable within? How can I be assertive with others when I am not being assertive with me? How can I be supportive to others if I am not supporting me first?

This week I have also realised how I tend to admire people that appear to be very organised and that appear to have time to do everything they want to do. If there is admiration, this is an indicator of a point that I perceive myself to be lacking and therefore I get entertained with the desire instead of learning with another and applying that in my own life.

Now I see that the desire to have free time is the desire to entertain myself, to be passive, to do nothing, so why do I want to have free time if I am not being assertive with the time I have? If I had free time, would I stop to write and study? Probably not. So my starting point hasn't been to manage my time for my commitments but to continue the patterns of the mind, under the excuse that I don't have time for everything. Finally, when the free time comes, I spend it with entertainment because it is a reward for my hard work of not doing what I really want!

The resistance to study is bi-polar: there is an initial thought of "this is too much for me" but when I transcend this barrier and I start, I really enjoy it and realise that I can do it. Indeed, I have all the tools to educate myself and to expand myself in the field that I am studying. When I am studying, other dimensions within my process become more clear as I read new authors and new perspectives on social/world issues. 

The same applies to the Desteni courses: an initial resistance to start writing - "it will take me ages to walk these points", but when I start the exercises, I bring my stability back and I realise how grateful I am for opening up these points within me. Each exercise allows me to work on new points that otherwise I would take much longer to face them.

So, where do I start? With myself and my commitments as my self-direction. Today I am re-starting my commitment to study for 21 days in order to break the habit of procrastinating, which include studying for my MA and the Desteni I Process. I will share with you how my daily application has changed based on my prioritisation and which resistances I face when trying to change my mind-patterns.

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DAY 103: Why do I feel embarrassed

I must deconstruct the moment of embarrassment to see all the layers under the experience of embarrassment  Walking it through self-corrective statements helps me to open us these layers within me.

This is a continuation of my blog: Embarrassment - Losing my comfort zone at work

When and as I see myself judging the action of speaking English in public as something too big and too risky for me, I stop and I breathe. In this sentence I realise the following: speaking in English is speaking a language, not more not less than speaking in Portuguese or in French; speaking in public is not different, or should not be different than speaking with myself or with the people that are close to me; judging something as more than what I perceive I can do is an idea, therefore, I can first do the action and then see what is that I must align in order to stand equal to that action - in this case, judging speaking in public to be a big task was my own mind-dictatorship telling me how to judge that moment and define me according to the experience and fear of being overwhelmed by something "bigger than me". Finally judging it as risky implies that I have an agenda to follow in order to stick to a certain image or reputation that only I invented to myself, instead of creating myself through my actions - is it not risky to stay stuck in my own imposed mind of ideas and fears? I realise that the risk is also an idea through which I limit my options and my own expansion. In fact, speaking in public in English is supporting me to stand comfortable with the language, comfortable with my own voice and making myself more clear to others. Speaking in public and outloud forces me to change the way I communicate, the structure of my narrative, it helps me to see what is relevant and what is ego, and I start enjoying myself in my communication in English, instead of getting frustrated with it.

 When and as I see myself holding myself back to the memory in my mind where I judge me in being embarassed, I stop and I breathe. Instead of simply accepting this memory as the only thing that was left from my past, I start investigating what is that the memory/mind/embarrassment and judgments are showing me what I have bee accepting myself to be and exist as. In this case, I realise that the memory of my performance as being the cause of failure is a manifestation of devaluation of my own self, whereby I judge everything that I do or touch as getting less value because I got involved. I also realise that the action of speaking in public was merely a few minutes of practically assisting the event, but the weight over this memory is the self-judgment. As the Eqafe interview also assisted me to see is that what my mind is showing me in moments of embarrassment is that which I fear others to thing of me, that in turn is a projection of that which I want to hide from others and, finally, of that which I want to keep avoiding facing within me. I commit myself to stop the habit of going automatically to the acceptance of self-judgments but to instead stop the self-judgment and support me to be stable in everything I do and to embrace my actions. I see that I would not harm me on purpose, nor would I deliberately decide in self-interest, because none of these "choices" are self-honest actions. So, if I think that others are judging me as less, I see that this is my own thought and that I must forgive me for diminish me in my relationship to others. I can only stand as life in this world if I stand for and as my own life and if I respect me as Life, equal and one with another being and all that exists. I commit myself to stop the attachment to the memory and to stop manipulating me through defining me as the memory and the accepted perceptions of myself and others. I commit myself to debunk my own personalities found when I investigate these moments of embarrassment.  I commit myself to restart again in each breath and let go of the judgments and give me time and practice the ability to know myself, to understand the patterns of my mind and to help me unconditionally to change me in self-direction in order to stand in oneness and equality and to be always self-honest.

Recommended Eqafe interviews:

Embarrassment: Is it Really so Bad? - Atlanteans - Part 107

Embarrassment: Embarrassment and Personalities - Atlanteans - Part 106

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DAY 92: Quantum Suicide and Quantum Life

Third Contact movie

This year I have had the opportunity to see the questions of life and death projected into the screens and scripts of two featured movies: one of them was the documentary The Act of Killing, and most recently, the thriller Third Contact. Today I will explore points that I realised while watching the latter.

This low budget movie touches upon the issues of bipolarity, depression, immortality, life after death, memories, past lives and traumas through visual communication and interlinked stories of the characters that we come across. This blog post is not so much a movie review but rather my sharing of the points that came up while watching it. At some point, I thought: what if that person (or someone going through the same mental turbulence) was to apply self-forgiveness on the memories of the mind, on the anger, on the sadness, on the experience that one is creating to oneself and others, on the past, on the self-definitions, the multiple personalities, the fears and on thoughts that are against oneself? Would this not be a form of re-birth? Are we not all desiring to kill the thoughts in our own minds that keeps us going on in circles and ultimately our own physical death?

I found that it is not a coincidence that the image of suicide is often related to bullet in the head, not in the heart - one is actually killing the mind, the thoughts, the addictions that we have never been educated to deal with. The heart is the physical organ that distribute the blood and the oxygen throughout the body, the same with the lungs that feel the body with the air we breathe, however, none of these organs are associated to suicide, because these are not supposed to be stopped while they are functionally working! Why would a human being kill its own body when is fully functional and healthy? Nevertheless, the body will stop working when the mind takes control. This has to do with our own acceptances and allowances, our misdirection and our distractions that keeps us away from our own self-honesty as Life. So, the act of suicide that pops up in the mind appears to be a "solution" to a Life that was never fully lived.

Back to the movie Third Contact, were these deaths real? Or was it the end of the personalities? Or even the end of memories that hold people back?  How would life be if we were to let go of the past?

I then considered that a quantum life, lived in every moment of breath, consists of a quantum death of personalities that must be cleared if we are to know ourselves.

Our physical existence allows us to birth in every breath we take, and to die in every out-breath. An opportunity to change who we have been so far. And I agree with the quote from the film, where she said: "Your concept of death is outdated", because at least for the majority of the people in the developed countries, death is not a consequence of physical hunger, or lack of healthcare or even physical abuse against human rights. Death here can appear as the idea of the mind that one cannot stand anymore, or that one does not have strength to face the problems in Life, or that one is emotionally fragile due to the end of a relationship, or that the loss of money took away one's pride and therefore life does not make sense in that person's mind.

For others, it is actually the concept of Life that has been disregarded and needs to be recreated - those are the ones that are starting to be aware that Life does not necessarily need to be a fight, or a struggle, or a proof to go to heaven, because life on Earth should be Heaven for Every single being.  This is the group of people where I  stand and I have been realising that a mind-death is actually a process of re-birthing from the physical within the realisation of who we are and what Life can be. The physical death, when it is not caused by physical accidents, it's the consequence of the self-abuse from within, as the physical body can only handle that much... And as I mentioned earlier, the act of Self-Forgiveness is one of the most revealing tools that I could ever come across to help myself, to face my mind, to get to know me, my fears, to stop allowing the depression within me, the polarity of lows and highs of the mind, the excitement and the passiveness, the paranoia and the movies in my own mind.

The director of the movie overcame his own resistance by living the decision of making this movie. As he said during the Q&A session, it was a priority that he gave to himself and directed himself to do it, without procrastinating anymore. We can learn from him! It is true that, at some point, we cannot stand our minds anymore and something must be done. Considering the pre-programme of the mind, we will go through the same cycles over and over again, even repeating our parents' patterns, until we stop creating and participating in such cycles of thoughts and actions.

As I got older, I could see the patterns manifesting in my different relationships and in different situations of my life. I couldn't see it by myself - it was just impossible because nothing in my reality was pointing me to a way out. My religion in Portugal was not helping either, quite the opposite. My friends did not know how to help and I was creating consequences around me. I wanted to understand what was going on and why the patterns were repeating. Where were the fears coming from? I also wanted to understand where my accidents were coming from. Was there a god punishing me? Was there a devil punishing me? What was the common element in all of these patterns? Was it me punishing myself? Was I creating my own thoughts and fears? Well, if I got the questions and I must have the answers. If I was creating these thoughts to myself, I should be able to delete the thoughts. If I was killing myself in such a state of mind, I must be capable of rebirthing myself in full self-awareness and start again. I can see this now. I couldn't see it before I was introduced to Desteni, their articles, the interviews, the forums and the videos. Even today I still ask myself how the hell was I able to hear them, considering that my mind is so complicated and suspicious. So I realise that I am the example to myself: if I was able to slow my mind, to start forgiving myself and to let go of my self-distrust, then this is the proof that I am able to change myself.

It is interesting that in the Third Contact movie, people shaved their heads when they were ready to "die". When I shaved my head for the first time I remember to think that I never thought I could do it, because I was not ready to LIVE myself, free of judgments! I could see other people doing it but not me. It was easy for others, but not for me. It was OK for others, but not for me.. The same with making movies: I thought that others could do it, but I couldn't. Until I took the decision to make my first video-clip.

I thought that others could be self-honest but not me, until I started to write for myself in complete openness and vulnerability.

I thought that others could write themselves on blogs but not me, until I started my blogs.

I desired others to change themselves but never considered that I could only change myself - until I took the decision to walk the Process of self-honesty and go through my deepest patterns, secrets, paranoia, memories and fears.

I did not have to literally kill myself to start seeing this; I did not have to ascend to a sky/heaven in order to be in peace with myself; I did not have to create conflict with others in order to see change around me - because my change is coming from within and is then manifested in what I say, write and do Here.

My physical reality is an indication and cross-reference of my own Process, as within so without, Life within, Life outside, in Oneness and Equality. So my own ideas of life and death must be challenged, questioned and changed. We have underestimated the potential of Life so much that death became the apparent easy way out, when the majority of the suffering is coming from our own minds, and this is unacceptable, considering that we could be doing much better in actually working on ourselves and then working together to make this Earth and Life an enjoyable place to be. Aren't Wars the projection of our own self-destruction? Isn't Poverty the manifestation of our own greedy mind separated from the others? Isn't this world a mirror of our own lack of self-responsibility for our own creation?

The process that I am walking is a Quantum process to be lived moment by moment, breath by breath, point by point, while walking the various layers of the mind. When a thought comes up, I take a breath and check within self-honesty what is my starting point, where is the reaction coming from or the fear, and I focus on clarifying it within me, self-forgive and let it go, so that when that point comes up again I am able to correct myself and not give in into the cycle. It is amazing to see that so much of my time on Earth is spent in the thoughts and concerns of the mind that really block me to look at other things in this world. It is also fascinating that since I started to sort out my own mind-mess I have been finally started my Masters in diplomatic studies and I am more than ever keen to work in this world to participate in its change for a better place for all, through common sense and solutions that are the best for all, me and the people. 

Would you go back to the mind-paranoia if you were to discover yourself as your own direction, as Life Here?

Movies mentioned:

http://theactofkilling.com/

http://www.thirdcontactmovie.com/

Supportive links:

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

http://desteni.org/

https://eqafe.com/free

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/

http://heavensjourneytolife.blogspot.com/

http://www.youtube.com/user/SunetteSpies?feature=watch 

http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/

Picture from: http://www.dailybeefcake.com/2013/07/02/bringing-third-contact-to-the-big-screen/

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DAY 86: At Most Fear: the atmosphere of the mind

Once Bernard asked Joao what was the one single thought that occupied his mind in everything he did. Today I decided to ask me the same question and the answer that resonated with my experience was the Fear of Death. It is not a coincidence that a few minutes before I had thoughts about a coach accident: in fact, over the last three weeks I have been traveling a lot and I just realised that I am fed up with this atmosphere of fear within me! I realise that I participate in the fear of dying each time I am on a plane, when I am on a coach, when I take a train and when I ride a bicycle, and all of the attention given to the mind is tiring and draining. I came to the limit and I realise that the point is here for me to walk it, step by step, letting it go.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to feed the fear of dying when I am traveling, instead of acknowledging that accidents do happen but that anticipating these is pointless because I am not supporting me to be present and aware of myself to help me in case of an eventuality.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to create thoughts of accidents and about my own death in my mind without realising that I am the only one responsible for keep feeding this pattern of thought within me and disregarding my Process of Becoming Life in every moment of breath (my existence).

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to entertain my mind with the pattern of fearing to die young and leaving all the things that I am currently doing, instead of realising and understanding that Self-Honesty is to honour life in every moment of my existence here and therefore I commit myself to stop the fear of the future but to rather focus on who I am in each moment Here.

I realise that the fear of dying young is based on stories from other people and the idea of self-victimization which are already a form of me giving up on myself and in my potential of changing the faith of failure towards Life.

When and as I see myself using examples of accidents from the past and stories from other people's deaths to justify the 'legitimacy' of my thoughts, I stop and I breathe. I see, realise and understand that I am the only one responsible for the thoughts that I accept within me and therefore it is my responsibility to not limit myself by the experience or stories from the people who died young which were thoughts that I kept within me in self-dishonesty and fear. I realise that living in fear is not living, as it is separating me from myself here.  

When and as I see myself having a thought about dying on a plane trip or on a coach or on a train, I stop the thought and the energy of fear and I breathe.   I commit myself to look at the situation in common sense and assess the practical preventive measures that I/all can apply in that current moment. I commit myself to stop the thoughts and let it go the fear of losing myself Here (distraction/not real), and by doing so I allow me to be present Here in complete self-awareness and stand stable within my physical body no matter what.

I will continue walking the fear of loss/death on the next blog, going through the need for controlling the reality, the contradiction of 'living' under stress and the memories from the past that I am limiting my future with.

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DAY 84: The Consequences of Losing Direction

I have never been aware of the point of Self-Direction before as I am now. Throughout my Process of writing, forgiving self and discovering Self, I have been slowly but surely becoming aware of my misdirection, my self-manipulation, my distractions, my excuses, my fears and all of the luggage that became to heavy to carry with me. This reminds me of a Portuguese rock band singing a song about how quickly we find ourselves with a child in the arms, in our own bubble, as if our Life had not been directed by us. So I ask myself: If I lose my Direction, what is moving me, who is taking decisions for me? Is it the past? Is it the mind? Are the others deciding for me? What are the consequences of losing track of my own creation? In order to see it, I suggest looking at the world as if you were its creator - There you go - the consequence of Our Creation. Because we All are its creators.

Recently I watched the documentary about the WikiLeaks story "We steal secrets" and one point that became clear to me was the consequence of the loss of direction in their process of making information public. The lack of Principles allowed the Ego to play the game and the whole world loss some potential realisations about equality, about the need for critical education, about the interconnectedness of world events, the terror of wars and about the demand for people to become responsible for the decisions that are taken in their name. Unfortunately, the whole message got distorted and, instead of common sense and motivation to change laws/systems in light of the facts, it instigated even more fear and separation between the top leaders and the people. Stealing secrets to give to the people will not work because the people are not educated to understand the secrets, to understand the consequences of those secrets and are not educated to change that which is abusive. So unless there was a clear direction of the individuals and the group with a political statement of what to do with such information, the whole story would shut down when the spotlights ended. And that's pretty much what happened.

Regarding the loss of direction, there is a really supportive quote from Bernard Poolman, where he says:

Direction establishes the steadfastness of Self as The Here (Life).

But as direction is overwhelmed and get lost within the zombified humanity,

the physical will break up (death) and Self becomes to nothing.

Stand with the Direction of The Here where the Self Stand Alone

Because those that have already walked are without direction (directionless).

And Everyone comes to Earth as the Answer (when you are born you are given Life) but Who will live the Answer Here?

Looking at the 26 years of my existence, I can see some phases and moments in my life where I lost my direction and deviated from my decisions and commitments and had no Principles within me. The consequences became the pattern of self-distrust, the fear of disappointing others, the separation within me and the need to fit an image of success in the system. My direction became separated from me because I allowed my thoughts to control me and I never stood for the Life Principles of Self-honesty, Oneness, Equality and Common Sense.

So the first step is to embrace this realisation which will certainly start kicking our asses to become real and aware of what is going on Here. Self-forgiveness comes in to not allow the overwhelmingness of the mind to discourage us to continue walking and to NEVER accept the deal of "it is too late" or "who am I to change this". As the creators, we will forgive ourselves for what we have allowed and accepted to create, participate and feed in this world. Even those points that we apparently think have nothing to do with us, in the end we will see that we are interconnected and that ALL my thoughts must change. The point Here is to realise that one will not change the world, but that changing oneself will change one's world and consequently will change every step that one takes on earth and every decision that contributes to how the world operates.

The second step is the commitment to recreate our creation in a different way. We see the problem = we know the solution. This is where the self-corrective statements are beneficial because, in each sentence, we are establishing an agreement of change within us and we truly take on the responsibility to change ourselves in our thoughts, words and actions, to start honoring/Being Life.

Finally, the ultimate Self-Direction is manifested in Living each and every single point in self-correction. There are no excuses to continue the mess in our minds, the chaos in the world, the self-dishonesty, the inequality and the abuse- We Know IT. As Bernard Poolman said: "The consequence of abuse is upon you in a single breath, yet it took many breaths of abuse in its creation. The correction of the consequence will take many more breaths than what it took in its creation. Many give up before they begin." So I ask Myself: Are we waiting for someone or something else to direct us? Are we that slaves? Or are we going to take on our inherited responsibility to take care of this Earth as ourselves, all Equally Here, walking in the Same Direction towards what is Best For All Life?

"Do not judge yourself for mistakes. You cannot make mistakes because if you walk...It’s not a mistake: it’s you correcting yourself. Get feedback and then change." Bernard Poolman

For more support, join the Desteni Forum, read the blogs, watch the videos, read the material and start this journey.

Illustration: SELF DISCOVERY - Available at andrewgableart.com

http://andrewgableart.com/store/self-discovery-original-drawing/

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DAY 82 - The Fear of not Making It

One of the points that arose in my mind following Bernard's death was that this Process is "too big" for me and I cannot make it, because I associate death to a punishment and that dying is a form of a "time out" of Life. It is fascinating and scary at the same time to see how the mind tries to justify events that I don't understand/not yet aware of, and that is why imagination pops up: because I don't have a reference and I believe that I "need to know" in order to Live.

Well, this knowledge is a distraction and an entertainment. Instead of feeding the imagination, I can/must start with the thoughts that are here manifested at the surface, so today on my post I will walk the idea that this process is "too big" for me and the associations I have created towards death.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to believe that Bernard's death must be justified so that in my mind I create a protection mechanism to avoid looking at the point that Bernard was walking, as I fear to have the same sudden death.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to perceive death as a punishment of God for not living my "mission" or whatever ideas I have of what I should be doing.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to believe and think that I am not protected by Bernard's common sense anymore and to believe that without Bernard I cannot take decisions for myself.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to think that my heart will stop if I go through intensive points wihtin me instead of stopping comparing myself to Bernard and stop justifying the resistance of the mind of continue walking my points in detail until I am fully clear within me.

When and as I see myself comparing myself and my process to other people's process, I stop and I breathe.

When and as I see myself participating in the resistance to walk a specific point manifested in the excuses of the mind, I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to  not to give in into the entertainment of excuses/fears of the mind and to focus on the patterns that is manifested in my thoughts.

When and as I see myself fear to speak about Bernard's death and noticing any energetic movements of anciety, regret, fear of the future, I stop and I breahte. I realised that this is a point that I must accept and let it go, undonditionally witihnhin and as the responsability of walking my physical stability as Life (no thoughts) and walking my process in order to recreate my own real stability.

When and as I see myself participating in the idea/imagination of being attacked by another being because I am not longer protected by Bernard, I stop and I breathe. I realise that this is a projection of security separated from myself. I realise that I haven't yet given myself this opportunity to deal with the fear, understand it and transcend it.

Within this, I commit myself to take responsibility for the fear of being alone to be sure that I trust myself in every way and to be certain that the "protection shield" of the mind is not real - I realise that these fears have been around with or without Bernard's presence and that only I can give this gift of Life to me.

I therefore realise that walking the process within and as me is the greatest support and independence I can give to myself.

When and as I see myself thinking that my world will fall over after this event, I stop and I breathe. I realise that my stance in Self-Honesty must be absolute in every moment of breath. Therefore, I understand that I am helping myself by writing on this point, by facing my fears, by applying Self-Forgiveness on the thoughts that pop-up and in committing myself to Walk until I am eternally Stable as Life Here.

Note: Some of the points are not shared on my blog as these are points are solely regarding my own memories and experiences. The patterns are explained and therefore anyone can apply these points to themselves and help oneself to walk his own memories/experiences in order to understand the patterns and correct one's acceptances/allowances.

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DAY 81 - A New Start In My Process

I have been walking the Desteni Process over the last four years and since last year I started writing my Journey to Life blog in Portuguese. This is the seven year process of writing that is shared in many blogs by people around the world and today I realised that it is time to have my Journey to Life in English, so that my words can be shared globally. This decision has also culminated with an event that has shaken my world recently: the death of Bernard Poolman on Sunday 11th August.

Where should I start? I will start from this present moment where I am now. There is a mix of surprise with Bernard's death, as well as a new confidence within me and in the Group of people walking this Process. The point of surprise comes from the idea of infinity that I had within me, like a child that believes that the parents will live forever - and that's what Bernard became to me: a father that stood as an example of Integrity, Self-Honesty, Self-Commitment to All Life on Earth. His support to others was unconditional while not accepting bullshit from the ego/mind's of humans. When I visited the farm in April 2012 I remember my initial nervousness when meeting him but soon I realised that we were equals and I allowed myself to Hear him without self-judgments and to simply Be there with the rest of the group. At the farm, I witnessed the potential of humanity in coexistence, in supporting each other, in finding solutions, in being practical, in enjoying ourselves together, in looking at our own selves and taking responsibility of each individual's correction.

Yesterday evening, when I came across the news that Bernard had passed away, my mind went into a state of denial and regret for not having been to the farm earlier this year to meet with Bernard again. This reaction of the mind showed me the pattern of regret that I haven't yet taken responsibility for, but the fact that I could see this point straight away without giving in to self-blame is the best thing I could give to myself. This shows me that my Process of self-correction is Real and that the awareness taught to me in the various chats with Bernard, Sunette, Esteni and others can be Practically Lived by me. That's what Bernard represents to me: the Practical Living Example of standing in Oneness and Equality, Self-Correction, fearless, stability and awareness of the interconnected existence that we, as Humanity, are responsible for. Therefore, by walking this Process, everything that Bernard represents exists in me in every moment of breath Here.

This morning, I went through my notebook from my visit to the farm and I started to allow the energy of regret within me for not having had more chats with Bernard, or for not taking "enough" notes, and for not having recorded every single word. It is interesting how my mind can sabotage myself by giving in into the pattern of wishing to go back in time. I now see that this desire is in complete self-interest to have the sense of comfort again, the sense of protection and security that I had when discussing points with Bernard. This is another indicator that I am not yet creating such Stability within myself. As Bernard said to me: "If you cannot stand Alone you are fucked because you are dependent."

On my notebook I found the following:

Points that I see in Bernard:

• Knows exactly what he does
• Self-Confidence
• Stands unconditionally
• Does not worry what other people say or think
• Speaks in common sense all the time

If I am Honest with Myself, I am still separated from these points as I am not yet consistent in my Direction, Self-Correction and Dedication to myself Here. Regardless of how many chats I could have with Bernard, it is up to MY decision to Become my Own Example of Living the Principles of Life. Bernard was not going to Walk the Process for me, of course. He did provide All the support that he could for everyone interested in becoming a better version of the human race. As Bernard also mentioned, "When we are born we are given Life but somewhere in between we lose direction and we lose who we are." so he put together  a bunch of materials online for guidance in our process of Self-Forgiveness, Self-Realization and ultimate Self-Change, and so started the foundation of a group (Destonians) of people that are willing to learn the Principles of Life, to walk them, to apply Self-Forgiveness, to know oneself and to become Self-honest. During the years that I have been participating in the group, I  have witnessed the quality of the material shared, the priceless information, the unique writings and its positive impact on my daily application, my own writings, my blogs, my choices in Life and my relationships. 

Therefore, I am Grateful for Bernard's existence on Earth. I am grateful for his kindness, for not giving up of his Process, for not keeping his solutions for himself and for establishing the founding blocks of the Destonians, of the Equal Moneymovement, of the Journey to Life blogs and of all the Courses that have been created to support everyone around the world. I am also grateful to Bernard for being firm in his communication with me, without bullshit, and for showing me solutions in common sense and helping me to see the mind/thoughts that I have allowed within me. And finally, I am grateful that Bernard instigated the seeds of a marriage with Joao, which did happen in September 2012. Bernard has always been ahead of the game!

For those that did not manage to go to the farm while Bernard was there, there is no point to regret it either. His words are available everywhere online, on his writings, videos and books, and only Self can walk this Process for Oneself. Again, there are no excuses to not live the Principles of Life as Bernard Poolman did.

In essence, WE HAVE ALL THE TOOLS WE NEED TO WALK THIS PROCESS AND GET IT DONE. Meaning, to realise who we can be as Integrity and Common sense. Overall, we are All potential "Bernards" as beings on Earth that are not accepting the pre-programmed thoughts of our minds to determine who we will become and that are not accepting the systems that are destroying our planet.

One major point that Bernard raised in our conversations was my Religion of Self and my judgmental patterns, which I am still understanding how these work in my mind and how these judgments shape my decisions. Many of them will be expanded on this blog, so that it can also support other human beings going through similar points.

Walking this process means to let go of the personalities, of the perceived comfort of the ego and every single judgement that creates separation with all that exists. There is no quick fix: it will take at least 7 years of self-commitment to walk through the patterns and personalities that I have built within me.

Many of the people walking this process are students, are future politicians, are economists, are artists, are teachers, are parents, are corporate, are directors, are unemployed, are psychologists, are educators... and the result of applying the tools of Desteni in our daily actions have enormous benefits in establishing self-stability, self-trust, self-appreciation and self-change. I have been meeting many Destonians and it is amazing to see human beings walking their own process of Self-Forgiveness and that we are equals in this Process: common fears, common realisations, common self-motivation, common care, common concerns and common willingness to change oneself and the world for the better.

So I ask myself: would it be different if I were to meet Bernard again at the farm this year? If the answer in my mind is a Yes, then I must investigate every single point that Bernard Poolman represents to me and investigate where and how am I not giving and living these points to myself unconditionally. Of course that his physical presence, his voice, his jokes will be missed when I am back to the farm this year, but his Words remain within Me by Living the Principles that He Stood for.

One must Hear the Message and Walk it.

Thank you for reading and for walking with.

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Day 80: LOVE is a COMMODITY

The Love campaign starts this week, where Destonians around the world are looking into Love - as that which became the reflection of this world system of the mind and economic survival - and re-defining it to become actual real change. 
Today's Love is a Commodity, something that is provided, exchanged, sometimes bought, let, consumed always in self-interest, ego, desire, need and, ultimately, based on fear of facing oneself.

Love is a commodity to which women and men accept and allow self to accommodate, the same way we have a money system that has last centuries due to the accommodation of Humanity to survival, in complete disrespect and disregards for Life ...


Who invented Love in such unfairness? Where does the accommodation come from? Who is selling and buying Love nowadays?
Everyone; Everywhere; Everyone.
Despite the fact that one sees the inequality and backchat around love stories, the latter are still on the top of search engines, hastags and facebook sharings. The Love has been used to cover all forms of self-responsibility, keeping one entertained with dreams and hopes, as if one is not in charge of emotions, reactions and feelings.
Love just like the humans, changes according to the energetic movements always jumping between the positive and the negative in the human's physical body. That is why thus far no one walked in self-stability, because we haven't let go of the accepted and allowed patterns of the mind to take over the movement of the breath. Love will never create peace, just like this system will never create peace.
"Love is Low". "Love is high". "Love is light." as it has been defined and promoted throughout time in the media to makes us as lovely consumers. Isn't it wonderful?
Let's say out loud: LOVE IS A LIE.

In this 7 years of process recreating myself, I dedicate myself to stop the lie within myself and this world to recreate myself for real, as an example of LIFE.

As Lindsay wrote on her amazing Journey To Life blog, in this self-agreement, "I agree to ensure that all decisions, all movements, all relationships are aligned to what is best for all and not a single shred of Self-Interest is allowed".
I have been realizing that the emotions of the so called love are energetic possession that are based on fear of lost, instability and fear of being alone. So who invented Love?? - The same mind that invented the money system. Not that difficult to see hein?
Once these patterns are seen, the decision of standing for and as Life steps in. From my experience, if I do not walk the decision to become/do what is best for all, I live the and in consequence. It would be such a waste of Self, as Life, if not allowing myself to Self-Love and Live-Self, in oneness and equality, stopping the mind and getting real in this physical reality.


But how can we See the Love that we have become? Isn't this a blindness?
The only way to see what Love really is, as that which we have accepted ourselves to become, if through Self-Honesty. By seeing myself as the deception, stuck in hope and illusions and plans, I start seeing what is going on inside me/around me Here, Now. This then leads me to FORGIVE MYSELF for that which I have accepted and allowed to exist, participate and create in this world as this self-anger, self-indulgence, acceptance without considering doing/being the best of me for the best for all. I Stop, I breathe and I walk the decision to live the new version of Love as Life on this Earth, in real practical application guaranteeing that no Lives are lost due to profit and abuse. Thus, only a system that Values Life can remain as an example of Love thy Neighbor as Thyself.

For more information about the 7 year process and Self-Forgiveness Statements, go to:

Artwork "What Real Love Is" by Kelly Posey http://kellyposey.blogspot.com/2012/05/day-12-what-is-real-love.html

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