June 17, 2015

Day 155: How to Deal with Crazy Drivers on the Road

Recently while cycling I noticed the tendency of wanting to take revenge on drivers when I see them doing silly moves on the road. I feel the urge of teaching them the "lesson" of what they just did by screaming at them. I feel angry with the person and I believe that I must do something about it.
If I look at this reaction closer I see that I am the only one building up the anger within me and that I am the one creating stress inside myself. Even if the other person caused some dangerous situation that frightened me, whatever happens after it is my responsibility. It is also my responsibility to stop the reaction and give me my stability back.

Another point that I discovered is that the anger that I may feel in the road context is actually showing me something underneath. So I started asking myself: Where is this anger coming from?
My point in relation to what the driver did might be valid but the anger is not. So I also started doing an exercise of checking within me other areas of my live where I am experiencing instability, for example, is there any frustration from my work or relationship that I am projecting into this present moment?

First and foremost, I must deal with the reaction because this experience is completely dependent on me. Therefore, I decide to assist me to stop these thoughts and I forgive myself for the stressful experience that I create to myself.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to get angry at another person when they so something silly on the road.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to participate in the urge of giving them a lesson by shouting at them or by doing the same silly thing unto them.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to project this situation in the mind and imagine my attitude against another.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to imagine me taking revenge against another and to tell them that they did a mistake and that they are wrong.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to move myself from the starting point of attacking another.
I forgive myself for not having accepted and allowed myself to be unconditionally stable within myself, directing myself in self-awareness while cycling, and to not get distracted by the thoughts in the mind.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire to speak with another from a starting point of punishment and superiority.
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to blame another for my reaction when I know that I am the one allowing the reaction to prevail within me.

Self-Corrective Statements
When and as I see myself getting angry at another for something that they did on the road and to blame another for my experience of stress and fright, I stop and I breathe.
I see, realise and understand that this is an automatic reaction based on seeing adults getting angry at each other on the road and that I am responsible for deciding who I want to be in these situations.
When and as I see myself blaming another for my experience and thinking that another deserves to have the same fright that I did in order to not repeat the scene, I stop and I breathe. I see, realise and understand that revenge is an emotion that only exists within me if I accept it and give value to it. I also see that imagining punishment will not solve the problem nor assist me to see the situation in common sense.
I see, realise and understand that I can direct my communication with another without reacting or participating in emotions, and that this approach is the best for both of us so that we can create an understanding about the issue and how it can be prevented in the future.

I commit myself to stop creating unnecessary stress within me by thinking that I need to give them a lesson, punish them or be mad at them. Instead, I assist myself to stop the imagination, to stand stable within me and to stand as an example of compassion, self-stability, maturity, and respect for another. I commit myself to speak with another in common sense and self-stability, without allowing the emotional reaction stepping forward. 
I commit myself to stop the ego-energy of wanting to be right on the road and to stop the belief that the other drivers are against me.

I commit myself to focus on being unconditionally stable to empower myself to be aware of myself, to be safe, and to change any automated reactions that distract me from being here. I also commit myself to create solutions for myself and to assist me interacting with others in constructive ways that are the best for all in any situation.


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