August 31, 2013

DAY 91: In the image and likeness of Barbies and Kens

I realise that since young age I created an admiration for blue eyes, green eyes and long hair. This is definitely related to the toys I had in my childhood, specifically the barbies that had a beauty beyond what I could ever have - I would never have such green eyes, or such a blond hair - and that was frustrating. For some years I actually desired the father of my children to have light eyes so that my children could be in the image and likeness of barbies and kens! Isn't this real brainwahsing? Now older, I can see how there is still an energetic reaction in a mix of admiration, jealousy and comparison each time I see someone who would fit in the image and likeness of barbies and kens
I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the women that fit in the image of long blond hair, or long brown hair, light blue or green eyes because I have put such physical characteristics as superior beauty and was unreachable to me because I did not have light blue or green eyes or a long hair. 

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to believe that women with such physical characteristics had advantages in our society because people would like them easily for their beauty. In this, I realise that there is a point of jealousy and comparison and desire to be easily liked by others without realising that I was the one accepting this starting point of superiority and inferiority based on physical appearance. 

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to believe that people with light blue and green eyes are nicer people because I associate to the good characters in movies that are sweet and kind, just like in the Disney stories, and to the image of angels in the churches.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to feed the desire to be accepted by others instead of looking at what is here, standing stable within and as my physical body, without comparing to another's body not having any image as a reference.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to create and participate in the separation towards other women based on the belief that they are like angels superior to me and that I am inferior because I have brown eyes and brown hair, without realising that the starting point of judgments and associations related to the physical traits are brainwashing from the media, advertising and movie industries.  

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to desire my children to have an easy life and to believe that they will be happier if they are physically perfect according to the image of perfection in our society of light eyes and blond hair.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to project into my children my own frustrations, instead of correcting these judgments within me to make sure that I stop my self-interest and the manipulation towards other people's lives.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to place admiration for physical look on top of self-honesty in my relationships with males and with myself.

Self-corrective statements:

When and as I see myself perceiving blond women with light blue or green eyes as specials, mainly because in Portugal is not so common to find these physical traits, I stop and I breathe.

I commit myself to stand equal and one with all the other beings regardless of their physical appearance and I commit myself to stop any emotional attachments related to admiration when seeing someone that corresponds to the image of "perfection". Instead of feeding the mind, I commit myself to see/stand in common sense and beyond the limitation of brainwashing for consumerism, comparison and jealousy. 

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to discriminate people according to their physical look based on the belief that blond people with blue/green eyes are luckier, I stop and I breathe. I realise that this is my own projection of inferiority by believing that I was less lucky for not being pretty and that I was rejected by others because I did not have a sweet look like an angel. I realise that I used the physical appearance as an excuse to justify my own beliefs, not allowing me to see that I was creating this experience and self-judgments in my own life. 

When and as I see myself associating the long hair and light eyes to the image of angels, I stop and I breathe. I realise that this idea of kindness and peace is not real and that these associations are a limitation because I am not allowing me to see people as equals as who we really are.

When and as I see myself looking at another being from a starting point of comparison, I stop and I breathe. I see, realise and understanding that the comparison pops up automatically as a defense mechanism of the mind to keep me attached to my own beliefs. Therefore, I commit myself to let these ideas go and to get to know the people without projecting my own self-judgments nor previous relationships. I realise that in order for me to know the others I must first get to know me, in self-honesty, clear from ideas, beliefs, judgments, images and memories. I commit myself to support me in being aware of my own thoughts when I am interacting with another being, responsible for stopping the patterns of thoughts/comparisons and I commit myself to forgive each and every thought that pops up in my mind.

I realise that the preference for specific physical characteristics come from the images that I saw on TV, in movies and in magazines that I associated to perfection, however I realise that once again this society found ways to make profit out of such associations to manipulate people to buy certain products such as barbies and products that are promoted by certain images. I commit myself to stop the cycle of image-manipulation, comparison, self-judgment and judgment of others within me by supporting me in stopping the thoughts and any energetic attachment and association to the differentiation of the physical look. Finally, I realise that it is ridiculous that we compare our physical bodies which have unique characteristics when what we can do it to is to change/correct ourselves through learning with each others, communicating with each and helping each other.

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